— Forgive Graciously —
“We have not created the heavens and the earth and everything in between except for a purpose. And the Hour is certain to come, so forgive graciously.”
— Quran 15 : 85
— Seventy-Seven Times —
21 Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, "Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?"
22 Jesus answered, "I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.
23 "Therefore, the kingdom of heaven is like a king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants. 24 As he began the settlement, a man who owed him ten thousand talents was brought to him. 25 Since he was not able to pay, the master ordered that he and his wife and his children and all that he had be sold to repay the debt. 26 "The servant fell on his knees before him. 'Be patient with me,' he begged, 'and I will pay back everything.' 27 The servant's master took pity on him, cancelled the debt and let him go. 28 "But when that servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denarii. He grabbed him and began to choke him. 'Pay back what you owe me!' he demanded. 29 "His fellow servant fell to his knees and begged him, 'Be patient with me, and I will pay you back. 30 "But he refused. Instead, he went off and had the man thrown into prison until he could pay the debt. 31 When the other servants saw what had happened, they were greatly distressed and went and told their master everything that had happened. 32 "Then the master called the servant in. 'You wicked servant,' he said, 'I cancelled all that debt of yours because you begged me to. 33 Shouldn't you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?' 34 In anger his master turned him over to the jailers to be tortured, until he should pay back all he owed. 35 "This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother from your heart."
— Matthew 18 : 21 - 35
— Violence and Structure —
"It's like the county jail. We all in here bro. Ain't no way around it. We got to have some structure. In the county, it be times when you walk into a dorm and it be like, 'You the enemy. You got to fight. But we're not going to jump you. We're gonna give you your head ups.'
That's structure. Cause if niggas getting jumped in this dorm, what you think is gonna happen next door, to your homie that's surrounded by 15 of my homies. Niggas in here getting stabbed in this dorm, what's gonna happen next door? Everyone's going to be getting killed. So, it's structure that prevents shit from going haywire."
— Nipsey Hussle (start at 52 min)
— You’re Just Talking —
You don't want no problems, you just— (Talking)
…
I just hope I haven't been the wrong influence
Put her on game before the world put her through it …
That's why I gotta break the curses that were set for me
This is hard work working, this ain't destiny
My motivation is just looking at my family tree
I'm trying to make sure I contribute for the legacy …
Once again the clouds are gathering to release what they held in …
— North West, Kanye West, and Ty Dolla Sign : Talking / Once Again
— Firas Zahabi : Some People Don’t Know the Reality of Violence —
We know the realities of violence. Some people don’t know the realities of violence. I’ve seen people on video, they are in a certain situation, and they act all crazy. This might spark some violent event here. You don’t want this. You don’t know what violence is. You’ve seen it on TV. You’ve seen it on a movie. You think you know what it is to be punched and kicked?
Sometimes I see people starting a fight and I’m like, “This person has no idea what they are talking about”. They’ve never been in a fight. They’re instigating a fight. A fight might occur and they might regret it …
When I am in public, the last thing I want to do is fight.
Wednesday, February 7th, 2024
10 : 35 PM
7. #EasyWayOut : Adolescence, Violence, and Forgiveness
Sometimes, it takes me a while
To settle and process my thoughts
Before I write them down …
This incident took a while
As it required me to embrace
Traumatic past experiences
Before I could dwell peacefully
In the present moment …
— Flashback : Last Friday —
”Please quiet down.
I’m right in the middle
Of my sentence …”
”I don’t give a fuck.
I would fucking kill you nigga.”
”Pardon me, you must not
Have registered the change of tone.
Are you serious?”
”Yeah nigga.
I would kill you.”
”Excuse me class.
Allow me a moment for this
Philosophical diatribe
And then I promise to
Return to the lesson …”
All the while
I am settling in my breath
As I am having flashbacks …
— Flashbacks —
— Eight Years Old —
I stand by the window
And stare across the street
As I watch a man
Stab another man multiple times
And the pool of blood
Around him widens with each strike …
Reread : 1. Meeting With Myself : Comfortable In Conflict
— Fast Forward Three or Four Years —
My older brother and father
End up in another fist fight
My father is angry
Picks up a chair and starts screaming :
”I”LL FUCKING KILL YOU!
I”LL FUCKING KILL YOU!”
He turns to me …
”DO YOU WANT ME TO KILL HIM?!”
And I am so scared.
I am speechless …
— Fifteen Years Old —
At this point
I am tired of the fighting
And make myself responsible
For keeping the peace …
I have a conversation with my mother :
”I am quite well behaved,
I get good grades,
And I am very respectful.
I do not anticipate
That your husband and I
Will have any problems.
I cannot have people scream at me
And I am unwilling to accept a beating.
Remember, I am older and stronger now.
I am not afraid to fight back.
You will lose your husband.
And I will not go to prison.
So, you will also lose your son …”
Thank God we never came to that point …
— Last Friday —
In 8th grade, I remember asking a teacher :
”What would you do if a student tried to fight you?”
She said that she would
Place her hand in front of her
Palm facing the student
In an effort to restrain them
And repeatedly tell them to stop …
That’s the stupidest thing
I have ever heard.
”Excuse me class.
Allow me a moment for this
Philosophical diatribe
And I will return to the lesson …
Allow me to share a quote that my oldest brother
Had once given to me :
”You ain’t the only real nigga.”
That means that you are not the only
One who has faced difficulties
And you are not the only one
Comfortable with violence …
Hand to hand
You wouldn’t be able to take me …”
I look at his friends
And they all nod and agree …
”You’re a terrible boxer
Have no wrestling ability
And you’d be submitted easily …
You’d be beaten mercilessly.
Mercilessly.
You have no weapon.
And if you step on my property
Remember, I have a licence to carry.
And imagine if I chose
To do this differently :
Do you know who I know?
Do you know who I mentor?
What if I had someone around your age
Visit you at work and deal with this quietly?
Have you thought through this thoroughly?
I know where you work
I know where you sleep.
After you said those words
Did you happen to weigh their gravity …
Here’s the truth.
You’re a sensitive
Fifteen year old kid
With no emotional regulation
And you lack maturity.
Learn to control your emotions.
Not everyone will be as kind as I am.”
And it goes silent.
And I turn back to my lesson.
At the end of class,
He comes up to me and says :
”You got that mister.
I’m gonna learn to
Control my emotions.”
— A Lesson On Forgiveness —
I do acknowledge that the words
Above are quite harsh
But the lessons are important
— For both of us —
I think about the friends
Who I had growing up
And how they’d be willing
To take action without conversation …
Ten years ago
— Before I began this journey —
That interaction
Would have gone differently.
At that time …
It wasn’t about making peace
Or seeing different perspectives
Rather, neutralizing the threat
And using that victim as an example …
So, the lesson for the student
Is the reality of violence …
In the end, no one truly wants it.
I don’t want to get hurt
Nor do I want to inflict
Harm on another …
But I unafraid to
In order to preserve my life …
We need to offer the adolescence
— Especially the young men —
A new way to address conflicts
With emotional intelligence
So violence is not their initial response …
But if they are never told
About the realities of violence
That they can possibly
Become arrogant, grown men
Who behave invincibly
Until they’re hurt mercilessly …
I learned something as well.
To forgive.
That diatribe is usually the final conversation
I would have with another human
But …
Saturday was Mini-Dan.
It was the first time
That I not only fasted food
But also fasted water
For the entire twelve hours …
To celebrate
I went to the theaters
To watch “The Chosen” …
A series about Jesus Christ
And the disciples that
Had followed him …
And though I was drowning in my anger
Settling peacefully through the fast
And heading to the theaters
Was an important pause
And allowed for me to ponder …
I offer no spoilers
But I can state that there is
A beautiful lesson of forgiveness
That had deeply impacted me …
Hence my text that Sunday morning …
Moreover, I am only human
So, I offer the gift of forgiveness
Because I know somewhere down the line
I will be in need of it …
So, I am learning to offer it
Much more graciously.
Alhamdulillah.
-- K.S. Fort
P.S.
I am only human, dear reader.
I admit my mistakes
And ask for forgiveness
When I am wrong.
— Second Incident —
————————
This is the series to the next poetic phase, “#EasyWayOut : Isolated to Inspired”.
Be aware, this series will have several breaks. One break will occur when I head to Las Vegas for a week. Another break will occur during Ramadan when I will be completely offline.
For those interested in books written in the past, feel free to read the Google Documents at this link.
Lastly, for those who want to support my journey financially (please remember, I do have a fur baby), purchase the Kindle books at this link.
Enjoy the journey and live with intention …
— As Always, We Are The Example For The Kids —